Hides the truth. These are the things called parables. Or poetry and cryptic prose. I won't read them, not the way I wrote them. No wonder most people don't enjoy my poetry.



I will NOT tell you, I am lonely, or am of little worth, or think of silly things. Because it's silly to tell them to you. I am NOT supposed to be of these things. Be happy!



And I must. Mustn't show my weakness. Then please read on. There'll you'll find it, not that I want you to.



Everything sucks.

Walk me down this pavement touched with rain-film

I got lost in San Francisco

Went around and round and couldn't find him

And I woke up! I woke before



This stranger could help me to the end

I wanted so much to get to him...

He was semi-waiting for me to get there

Sitting on the bed in his shirt and jeans

the same old.



I wanted to I wanted to

But I missed him. So nearly so far.

!

I - want to get back to that horrible dream



Of finding him. Actually getting there.

Not merely getting bullied along the way by teenage Americans I somehow met

Will I -

Get there?



Will I -

Get there? I have to. I have to and it's in my head.



Seeing him every week, in real person

In depth and distance

Lovely human. Would love to have him. Really have him.

When can I? Will it be me. I will trench around in despair.

Yah.



Yayaya ya....

Sunday, God spoke to me about a miracle that He would give me at work on Monday.



I would really need that, thanks. Because my work needs a major turnaround, otherwise, there would be no longer any return.



Nothing but a little bitty faith, Monday arrived.



Thereon, Shuyi msged me in the morning,

"Elaine dear, you must hang on. This is a very trying period for you. It's a challenge. I believe in you. It's only from challenges that we discover how much we can actually achieve."



A little bit of faith.. a spoken word from God.. a miracle.. that I would always have encouragement when I need it.



That's it.



Little things done with great love. From my God. Makes such a huge difference in the climate of that office cubicle. In the despair of my heart. In the lack of motivating team-mates. Sometimes small things do so much matter.



Amen.

It won't be me.

This is a song

about letting go

about breaking down

and giving ourselves over to

Jesus Christ



'I am the only one to blame for this

Somehow it all ends up the same

Soaring on the wings of selfish pride

flew too high

and like Icaharus I collide



'In a world I try so hard to leave behind

To rid myself of all but love

To give and die



'To turn away and not become

Another nail to pierce the skin of one who loves

More deeply than the oceans

More abundant than the tears

Of a world embracing every heartache



'Can I be the one to sacrifice?

Or grip the spear and watch the blood and water flow?



'Take my world apart

I am on my knees

Take my world apart

Broken on my knees



'All said and done I stand alone

Amongst remains of a life I should not own

It takes all I am to believe

In the mercy that covers me



'Did you really have to die for me?

All I am for all you are

cos' what I need and what I believe are worlds apart



'Take my world apart

I am on my knees

Take my world apart

Broken on my knees



I look beyond the empty cross

Forgetting what my life has cost

Wipe away the crimson stains

That hold the nails that still remain

More and more I need you now

I owe you more each passing hour

Battles between grace and pride

Gave up not so long ago

So steal my heart and take my pain

Wash my feet and cleanse my pride

Take this selfish dirt away

All the things I cannot hide

Take my beauty take my tears

Sin and soul its yours

Take my world apart

Take it now, take it now

Serve the ones that I despise

Speak the words I can't deny



I look beyond the empty cross

Forgetting what my life has cost

Wipe away the crimson stains

That hold the nails that still remain

Take my beauty take my tears

Sin and soul heart its yours



All the things I cannot hide

Take my beauty take my tears



Take my world apart.. Take my world apart



Its worlds apart.'



Jars of Clay - Worlds Apart