rage and pain

I have a lot of rage in me. Right now. Often.

This is why I need exercise.
This is why I crave alcohol daily.
This is why I need Xan*ax.

This anger has no reason. It just IS. It just exists. It just remains.
Until I medicate.


Yes, I am still sad. Despite functioning normally and living life in a seemingly hyper-elaine, energetic way.

I am still sad.
I still hurt.
It still hurts.

I am still angry.

I am still sad.

I just can no longer do very much about it.