loop

I can't sleep.
Pain is magnified;
a headache -
- my body feels numb
paralysed.

I see pictures
Making patterns
illogical shapes -
- I snap out of it
but for how long?

I need a fix.
A silent night
awake -
feels like hell.
I need to sleep.

The reservoir
is running dry on hope;
Death is best prescribed
not awaited,
not knowing when

Knowing, not
knowing -
circular loops
in my brain -
go round and round.

Despair -
is life without medication.